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Annie – Brooklyn, New York

Malcolm was here today – the whole weekend actually, but today I got to spend the most time with him. Still it wasn’t enough time to really catch up. When we were walking through the park after the Whitney, I felt like we had forever left to talk. Then Columbus Circle, then the long train ride to Grand Street. Suddenly, it was almost time to meet our friends for dinner and I found myself talking with my mouth full, trying to enjoy a honeydew custard while quickly running through the last dark months of my life.

A TV in the bakery we were in was broadcasting a Chinese game show with all sorts of wacky challenges. One of them was to blow out a line of candles through a piece of nylon stretched onto a frame. Each participant lunged towards the candles blowing as hard as they could against the nylon, which distorted their faces in amazingly hilarious ways. I laughed so hard, I started crying. But then I couldn’t stop and I realized I was actually crying so hard, I was laughing. Each tear was a strong cocktail of emotion squeezed through my face. I don’t think Malcolm really understood what was happening and I was just glad I could laugh and cover up my complete sadness.

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